Editor's picks

Animal Jokes – Dog Jokes

     

Where do you find toy poodles?

        
In a toy store…where else?

        

What do you call a happy Lassie?
              
        

A jolly collie!

        

How do you catch a runaway dog?
               
        

Hide behind a tree and make a noise like a bone!

        

What is the all time favorite Broadway musical in Dogland?
                
My Fair Laddie!

        

What dog loves to take bubble baths?
                 
A shampoodle!


   
        

What dogs are best for sending telegrams?
                  
        

Wire-haired terriers, of course?

        

What terrier is like the little engine that could?
                   
        

I think, a cairn!

        

What dog is always good for a laugh?
                    
        

A Chihua-ha!

        

Which dog sets a furious pace?
                     
        

The Russian wolfhound!

        

What dog is disliked by many?
                      
The Doberman, because it’s a pinscher!

        

Which dog is as warm as a blanket?
                       
        

An Afghan!

        

Which dogs speak?
“Herd” dogs!

        

What dog stands the best chance of winning the heavyweight title?
                         
A Boxer, of course!

        

What kind of dog does Count Dracula prefer?
                          
Any bloodhound!

        

What do you call it when 3,000 dogs and cats get sent to the pound?
                              
        

A doggone catastrophe!

        

What do you call a setter who can’t point?
                                
        

Disa-pointing!

        

When is a dogs tail not a dogs tail?
        When it’s a waggin’ (a wagon)!

        
        

What holiday do dogs like best?
 Howl-a-ween.

        

What kind of dog sniffs out new flowers?
 A bud hound (bloodhound).

        

Why didn’t the dog speak to his foot?
 It’s not polite to talk back to your paw.

        

Why did the dog feel as frisky as a puppy?
         It got a new leash on life!

        

Why do some of our canine friends prefer to stay home?
 Because it’s a dog-eat-dog world out there!

        

What do you call a nutty dog in Australia?
         A dingo-ling!

        

What is the dogs favorite city?
 New Yorkie!

        

Who was the dogs all-time favorite comedian?
         Growlcho Marx!

        

No Dogs Allowed
        A guy wanted to take his Chihuahua into a restaurant with him, so he put on dark glasses and “tapped” his way into the establishment. The waiter said “Hey!, you can’t bring a dog in here. “The man indignantly claimed “I’m blind! … this is my Seeing Eye dog!” “You’re trying to tell me” said the waiter, “that this Chihuahua is a Seeing Eye dog?” “What???!!”, cried the man, “they gave me a Chihuahua?”  

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