Animal Jokes – Dog Jokes
Where do you find toy poodles?
In a toy store…where else?
What do you call a happy Lassie?
A jolly collie!
How do you catch a runaway dog?
Hide behind a tree and make a noise like a bone!
What is the all time favorite Broadway musical in Dogland?
My Fair Laddie!
What dog loves to take bubble baths?
What dogs are best for sending telegrams?
Wire-haired terriers, of course?
What terrier is like the little engine that could?
I think, a cairn!
What dog is always good for a laugh?
Which dog sets a furious pace?
The Russian wolfhound!
What dog is disliked by many?
The Doberman, because it’s a pinscher!
Which dog is as warm as a blanket?
Which dogs speak?
What dog stands the best chance of winning the heavyweight title?
A Boxer, of course!
What kind of dog does Count Dracula prefer?
What do you call it when 3,000 dogs and cats get sent to the pound?
A doggone catastrophe!
What do you call a setter who can’t point?
When is a dogs tail not a dogs tail?
When it’s a waggin’ (a wagon)!
What holiday do dogs like best?
What kind of dog sniffs out new flowers?
A bud hound (bloodhound).
Why didn’t the dog speak to his foot?
It’s not polite to talk back to your paw.
Why did the dog feel as frisky as a puppy?
It got a new leash on life!
Why do some of our canine friends prefer to stay home?
Because it’s a dog-eat-dog world out there!
What do you call a nutty dog in Australia?
What is the dogs favorite city?
Who was the dogs all-time favorite comedian?
No Dogs Allowed
A guy wanted to take his Chihuahua into a restaurant with him, so he put on dark glasses and “tapped” his way into the establishment. The waiter said “Hey!, you can’t bring a dog in here. “The man indignantly claimed “I’m blind! … this is my Seeing Eye dog!” “You’re trying to tell me” said the waiter, “that this Chihuahua is a Seeing Eye dog?” “What???!!”, cried the man, “they gave me a Chihuahua?”